Missing Lipstick
I’m a little bit of a lipstick nut – it helps me find joy in the little things! I love a good lip color, especially one that has staying power with potency that adds energy and exuberance to my day. Lipstick can do that!
Today I’m missing lipstick. Lipstick was once one of those little life’s luxuries that I could always enjoy. Seeing smiles and laughter, giving hugs and kisses were something I could count on. But this year, 2020, we can’t even shake hands with each other. It is unsettling and upsetting to me. Seeing kiss marks on my grandchildren’s cheeks and beautiful, colorful lips smiling hellos my way, are things I haven’t seen for months due to the country-wide mask mandate.
I’m okay with wearing a mask. I get it. It shows respect for others and helps to keep us safe from the dreaded Covid-19 virus. I also know there is a lot going on in this world with real, serious problems out there that need my attention! So, complaining about smeared lipstick on the back side of a cloth mask seems a little trivial. But, I still want to find joy in the little things! Because of this, I hold back and don’t tell anyone about missing lipstick. Yet, isn’t it sometimes the little things, like the pebble in your shoe, that can make us feel sad instead of glad? Putting on lipstick gives me a little pick-me-up as I head out the door – talk about finding joy!
I miss chit chatting in line at the grocery store wearing “Robust Red” on my lips, having friends over to eat dinner showing off “Warm Ruby,” cheering loudly at a Chicago Cubs baseball game with “Glimmering Gloss” on, being in person in meetings flashing a “Cheery Cherry” smile, singing in church wearing “Kind Coral,” and blowing kisses of “Puckering Pink” to family and friends. These things brighten my day.
It’s those little things, like face to face interactions, that make me feel like I am a real person. I want to see you and your smile in person. I want to feel your hug around my neck and your kiss on my cheek. It hurts my heart to be told, after being at a church service last Sunday with a small gathering of masks wearers, “Please exit the building quickly – and refrain from congregating with each other.” Isn’t congregating and friendshipping each other a VERY important reason we go to church?
When the little things start adding up, I feel a little shaky and want to go find a soft blanket and curl up in it, and have a good cry. I know it’s wise not to ignore these things. If I am not careful, they can trigger my depression and anxiety. I begin to experience feelings of despair and sensations of being weighed down, along with feeling agitated and having a lack of focus. Today, I’m going to say it out loud. One, two, three, go… “I miss lipstick.” Being able to say it helps me to feel free. And it makes it so I can validate what’s going on in my head. Writing about it helps me feel compassionate toward myself and boosts my mood. And after I’ve taken those steps, I try to find more joy in the little things.
In its wake, Covid has brought tragedy while teaching us some valuable life’s lessons. It has also turned our lives upside down. How are you doing? Maybe you are missing something simple, too; something you used to count on. Are you curled up in a blanket? I’m going to go up to my bedroom right now and dress up and put on some lipstick, pucker up, take a selfie and send it with love to my friends – in case they are missing my shimmering smile. What would help you feel well? Maybe you would like to join me in reaching out to your family and friends by blowing kisses too. Maybe, you miss lipstick!
Elaine H. Quinn
